FADE IN:
INT. HALLWAY -- NIGHT
BUFFY stands in the hallway, in front of a closed door. She's
in a high school, or a similar place. It's night, so it's
mostly empty. She's looking straight ahead at the door, but
we don't see the whole door itself just yet.
BUFFY
I can do this.
(beat)
It'll be good to do this. I can open
up and release my feelings within a
group of people that have been through
the same thing.
She takes a deep breath and releases it.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
So here I go.
She opens the door and walks in. As she enters, the door
closes behind her. We see on it now, a sign that reads :
N.D.R.
INT. CLASSROOM -- CONTINUOUS -- NIGHT
Buffy is standing next to the door still. She's looking
around, awkwardly. The room is a classroom, but that's not
what it's being used for tonight. PEOPLE sit at desks. On
the chalk board, "N.D.R. MEETING" is written.
Buffy continues to look around. Finally, she spots coffee
pots set up on a table in the back of the room. She's relieved
to have something to do.
BUFFY
Coffee. Coffee's good.
She goes to the coffee.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
Hello, coffee. Are you regular or
decaf?
She pours herself a cup and takes a sip as she looks up.
She's shocked to see a man, VERGIL (30's, balding, in a dress
shirt and tie), standing right next to her.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
Gah!
She gathers herself.
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2.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
I'm sorry. I'm a little jumpy. My
first time.
She laughs just a little too hard at herself.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
Be gentle.
Then she realizes just how geeky she's acting and settles
down.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
Really, I'm not usually this ditzy.
And I don't usually talk to my coffee
either. I'm just a little weirded
out about being here.
She looks at Vergil. He looks back. Still, he says nothing.
He just looks at her. She has no idea why.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
The coffee. It's free, right? For us
to drink?
No reply. He just looks at her some more.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
Okay, it's nice talking to you. We'll
do it again. Oh look, a wall.
Buffy crosses the room and stands next to a wall, looking at
the head of the classroom. Waiting.
After a beat, she turns around, looking for a seat to sit
in. Vergil is standing right next to her again. Watching
her.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
Gah!
(beat)
Is what I say to you once again.
Y'know when I said we'd talk again,
I thought maybe we'd do it later. I
just really need to focus and gather
myself. I'm nervous, y'know.
Still, he watches her.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
Are you okay? Do you need help or
something?
Still, no reply from him. Buffy looks around the room, looking
for an out. Finally, she sees a woman, BETTY (20's, pretty,
but a plain dresser) sitting in one of the desks, not talking
to anyone. Buffy considers her idea.
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3.
She looks at Vergil once again and decides to go for it.
She waves at Betty.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
Joan! Hi!
Buffy walks to Betty.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
It's been forever since I saw you.
She leans down close to the woman and whispers.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
Sorry, I'm just really trying to get
this guy to stop watching me.
BETTY
My name's not Joan.
BUFFY
Oh.
Buffy looks back and sees Vergil still watching.
BUFFY (CONT'D)
Well, it's still good to see you.
How long has it been?
BETTY
Look, lady, I don't know you. Would
you mind not pretending to know me?
BUFFY
Right. Sorry. Thanks.
Buffy looks back at Vergil who is still watching. She raises
her coffee cup and smiles. Then she turns and picks a desk
to sit in that's as far away from both Vergil and Betty as
humanly possible.
A woman, NANCY (50's, very June Cleaver-y) walks to the front
of the room.
NANCY
Okay, people. I think it's time that
we settled in and took our seats.
The rest of the people sit down and get quiet. Nancy stays
at the head of the classroom.
NANCY (CONT'D)
Okay, great.
(MORE)
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4.
NANCY (CONT'D)
(beat)
I'd just like to take this time to
welcome everyone back to another
Near Death Recovery meeting. Life
is so precious, and I'm thrilled
that you all decided to share a little
bit of yours with the rest of us.
(beat)
So who would like to start this week?
A few hands go up. Buffy decides it'd be best to just observe
for a little while before taking part. She slouches down.
Nancy looks around the room. She spots Buffy.
NANCY (CONT'D)
Oh. I see we have a new soul among
us tonight. Would you like to begin,
dear?
Buffy straightens up.
BUFFY
Oh, no. I think I should just watch
for a while first. Maybe. I mean...
NANCY
Pish posh. No need to be nervous
here, sweetie. We're all here to
welcome you with open arms and to
help you on your journey back from
the light.
BUFFY
Great. That sounds really... great.
But...
NANCY
Oh, wonderful! Everyone let's have a
big hand for this young woman. C'mon
up here, honey!
Everyone starts clapping. Buffy hesitantly stands up and
walks to the front of the room, trying to keep a smile on
her face but finding it hard.
Nancy takes a seat.
BUFFY
Um... I don't really know what to
say.
NANCY
What's your name?
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
5.
BUFFY
Buffy. Buffy Summers.
NANCY
Welcome, Buffy. Now, why don't you
tell us about your experience.
BUFFY
Okay.
(beat)
Well, it was in May of last year. My
sister, Dawn and I lost our mother a
couple months before that, so things
were hard.
A MAN in the room yells out.
MAN
Great, another suicide attempt. "Oh,
it's so hard!"
(beat)
Let me guess. You look like a jumper
to me. Did you jump?
BUFFY
What?
(beat)
I-I guess. I mean, yeah. I did, but...
MAN
I knew it.
NANCY
Now, now. We're not here to judge.
Please, go on, Buffy.
BUFFY
Well, like I said, my sister and me
were going through hard times and
she got into some trouble with this
woman, Glory. And one thing led to
another and I ended up having to
jump in order to save her.
MAN
Why do they always think it'd be in
their family's best interest if they
just weren't there? Like your sister's
life was really going to be so much
better without you. You jumped because
you wanted to jump. Just admit that.
BUFFY
No. You don't understand. I didn't...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
6.
NANCY
You don't need to explain yourself,
dear. He's just a little rough around
the edges is all.
BUFFY
Thanks, but...
NANCY
Why don't we see if anyone else would
like to talk to you. I'm sure we're
all eager to get to know you better.
Would anyone else like to talk with
Buffy?
A another man in back, MARTY (nervous, quiet type), speaks
up.
MARTY
How... How long were you... y'know...
gone?
BUFFY
Um, it's really kinda hard to tell.
It was a while.
MARTY
Two? I was gone for two minutes.
BUFFY
Longer than that. I was gone for a
good amount of time.
MARTY
Three?
Buffy thinks about her answer.
BUFFY
Yes. Three. About three. Three would
be just about the right word to
describe how long I was gone.
NANCY
Wow. That's quite a length of time.
Another woman, DINA, speaks up.
DINA
Did you see anything while you were
gone?
BUFFY
What do you mean?
DINA
White lights. A tunnel.
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7.
BUFFY
Light. There was light.
(beat)
And it was warm. It was like home,
y'know? Like everything was right
there.
DINA
I know.
(beat)
When I was there, it's like my whole
body was tingling.
BUFFY
Oh, there aren't bodies there. We
don't have bodies there.
DINA
Yes we do. I remember it. I was there.
BUFFY
No, I mean, really. I remember it
pretty well. There weren't bodies. I
mean, we are us, but we're not...
bodies.
DINA
I was there. I think I know what it
was like.
BUFFY
Yeah, but I was there longer. I mean,
were you there for... three? Three
is a long time to be there. I have a
pretty good memory of the place.
DINA
I was there for two and a half
minutes.
BUFFY
Ah! Two and a half minutes is not...
three. Three is a whole lot longer
than two and a half minutes. It's...
three.
DINA
Look. I'm sure that you remember
what you do, but I know what I saw.
I saw it with my own eyes.
BUFFY
Are you calling me a liar?
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8.
MAN
I could tell you were a liar from a
mile away.
(beat)
Buffy. Nobody in real life has that
name. It's obviously a fake name.
MARTY
You wouldn't come here just to make
fun of us. Would you?
BUFFY
Me? No. But you don't have bodies in
Heaven. Trust me.
(beat)
Maybe she's the liar. Yeah. She's
the liar. It's so easy to see. I
mean, look at her... nails. They're
all bitten and stuff. Only liars
bite nails. Liars and thugs. She
could be a thug.
NANCY
I'm sorry, young lady, but Dina has
been coming to these meetings for a
very long time. We trust her very
much.
BUFFY
Well, I don't know what to tell you.
She's wrong then. Maybe she wasn't
in Heaven at all. Y'know, I hear
that it could just be residual energy
left in the brain that cause
hallucinations. Maybe this whole
thing is in her head.
DINA
No. It's real!
Dina puts her face in her hands and starts crying.
NANCY
I think you'd better go, young lady.
BUFFY
What?
Nancy won't reply to her. Buffy just walks out of the room
like a kid who has been grounded by their parents.
NANCY
And next time, maybe you'll think
twice before you try to get your
laughs by pretending to be a person
who has suffered a great deal.
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9.
Buffy stops and turns around.
BUFFY
But I did die! I died a lot. Twice,
actually. And the last time, I was
really dead. I was dead for three
months. Yeah, months!
MAN
I can't stand liars.
BUFFY
I'm not lying!
NANCY
Please just leave.
INT. HALLWAY -- NIGHT
The door opens and Buffy walks out. The door closes behind
her.
She stands there for a moment, not quite getting what just
happened. She hears a DOOR KNOB RATTLING.
She looks at the room directly across the hallway. There's a
paper taped to the door with the letters "W.A." written on
it.
The door opens. VOICES CAN BE HEARD FROM INSIDE.
VOICES
Get out of here! / It's people like
you that keep stereotypes alive! /
You make me sick!
From that room, WILLOW walks out. The door closes behind
her. She and Buffy both just stand there, looking at each
other for a moment before either one speaks.
BUFFY
How'd your's go?
WILLOW
They wouldn't even believe that I
was a real witch.
BUFFY
I know!
WILLOW
They were all saying that it's people
like me and Bette Midler that give
witches a bad name.
(MORE)
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10.
WILLOW (CONT'D)
(beat)
And this one guy wouldn't stop looking
at me. He just kept staring. He never
even said anything.
BUFFY
What a bunch of freaks.
WILLOW
Yeah.
They start walking down the hall, toward the exit. As they
get a good way down the hall, another door opens. ANYA walks
out.
Buffy and Willow look at her for a moment, with questioning
looks. Finally, Anya speaks.
ANYA
Knitting class. Very educational.
They continue walking out.
FADE TO BLACK :
THE END